Thursday, May 28, 2009

Musing - 28 May 2009

Concentrate.
Slow and supple, strained
Beyond limits imposed by
The weak minded.
She told me that it would
Be difficult to believe
But once I did, the rest would
Be nothing.
I carried my own thoughts
Into the proverbial mixture,
Thinking that I had
A chance of redemption.
Instead, I found bitter virgins
Crying to a dead god,
Wondering why their eyes bled.
She told me that I was special,
Filled with stuff that made
others angry. And what
Kind of gift, I asked, would
That be?
Concentrate till everything
Is Indigo, she replied,
For nothing is what
It seems.
28 May 2009

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Musing - 13 May 2009

Two eyes, one of blue,
See backward like Janus
Except I got a better deal.
Past reflections are seen
Across the orb, milky undertones
Surfacing like an oil slick
That smells of rose petals.
Two eyes, one of blue,
Are used to pour through ancient tomes
That tells of Mankind’s history
From hard earned intellect
To widely practiced hedonism. I count myself
Among the less fortunate, those who
See while using their own will.
My frequently worn glasses
Humble me.
Two eyes, one of nothing.

13 May 2009

Friday, May 8, 2009

Musing - 8 May 2009

She decided to wear a red dress to the wedding, a clear sign of defiance to everyone there. Although Monica had not been invited, she felt that her presence was still necessary for the event. After all, the groom in this charade of a wedding and marriage was her ex-boyfriend, Charles. He never loved her during their time together although he claimed he did. He never respected her mind and soul, for she was light years ahead of him on everything and he could not stomach such a plain truth that hurt his pride. He left her after being with her for two months, claiming that she was smothering him, then began dating Anna, a farm girl from the next town. Although Anna was a good natured woman, she proved to be no threat to his pride and low intellect. She only had eyes for him and did whatever was required of her by him. Monica knew all of this and more, thereby giving her more than enough reason to show up at the wedding in a red dress. After checking her reflection in the mirror for a third time, she left her home and walked down the road to the church. It was beautiful Spring day with cooling breezes as a bonus, but Monica did not notice her surroundings. Every step she took increased her courage and determination to be at the wedding, regardless of the outcome. When she reached the massive oak doors, she took a deep breath, released it, then gripped the handles and opened the doors. The creaking sound of the doors caused the entire congregation to turn their attention and gazes away from the slightly shocked bride and groom and instead focus on the newcomer, who wore a red dress and a simple grin that meant so much more.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Musing 7 May 2009

He once told me that he used to travel to three different places every year. Each place, each time, was like taking a sip of fragrant and delicate jasmine tea in different cups; such pleasures were simple and yet complex like himself. His last destination was to the Amazon, purely on a whim. When I asked him to tell me more about his adventures there, he suddenly grew quiet and took a long sip of his tea from his large purple and black dotted mug. For several awkward moments, my eyes wandered around, taking in our location and the other people who occupied it. I felt a brief sense of pride as if I was better than everyone else there because I was with him. I belonged here with him while the others were merely pretending to have even a modicum of what we had. When my eyes finally locked with his own again, he smiled and took my hand in his. When I asked him what was wrong, he replied that he loved me and no one else. Suddenly, my body felt much lighter, like the cooling tea in his cup.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Musing - Reflections of a Corporate Goth

While driving to my parents’ house the other day, I searched for a decent CD to play because the radio stations offered nothing but noise. As I searched through my glove compartment while still keeping a sharp eye on the road, I discovered a Cure CD (Wish) that I had bought for my ex-boyfriend last year. I was never a diehard fan of their music back in the day but I played the CD out of sheer limitation of options for keeping the silence in my car at bay. Instantly, the sounds of lush guitars and Robert Smith’s half wailing, half singing voice filled the inside of the car. I was immediately sent back to my 20s when I was uber Goth and proud of it. During my college years and shortly after, when I was trying to find and define myself, I stumbled upon Goth and was seduced by the clothing, the mindset of the people, and the music that defined us misfits to the rest of world and to each other. The CD reminded me of wilder times, when my friends and I struck out against the world with our clove cigarettes, coffin shaped purses and backpacks, and darkly stained lips, daring anyone to ask us if we realized that it was not Halloween. It was those years and the experiences I had that helped shape me into the woman I am today. Now, as a Corporate Elder Goth Steampunker Author, or a woman who wears many darkly coloured hats, I realize I can never remove that part of my life because I am truly grateful for it. The Cure CD is now a part of my music collection in my flat, adding its essence to what makes me tick in this crazy world.

Musing - 4 May 2009

There was a time when he was afraid to look at her, for her eyes reflected his regrets and losses of the past. She was a window that showed his life better than he ever could and he was terrified of it. He married her for love and that same love was there, but things were different now. Now, whenever she walked into a room that he sat in, he could feel the loneliness seeping from within. Words were barely spoken between the two in their golden years; he from fear and she from resignation of the entire situation. Their love from before was still there between the eccentric and happy couple; it was a love created for them and them alone.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Thank You to the Revenger Crew

During my recent trip to Huntsville Alabama to visit my boyfriend, I spent some time with Captain Tomas Quin of the Airship Revenger (Steampunk crew). I first made his acquaintance in February during ConNooga in Chattanooga, TN and we became friends soon after that. Since that time, I have spent time with the crew members (my boyfriend Michael Greenway being one of them) and I have enjoyed every minute of it, learning more of the Steampunk way of life and just being around good people who share similar thoughts and goals as I. Imagine my surprise this past Saturday when Tomas presented me with an official pin of the Revenger, making me a crew member! I was moved to tears but instead hugged him and my boyfriend tightly, thanking them profusely for this show of trust and friendship. I am proud to be a member of this illustrious crew and I hope that this librarian/researcher will not let them down. Thank you very, very much.

Absinthe Dreams to you all!